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03
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Emily Gilmore delivering the slay of all slays. YAS QUEEN.

Seriously, this is one of these moments where you just need a minute to compose yourself because it’s so fucking good. 

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Oh fucking hell.

(via bartonfinks)

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(Comic book spoilers, I guess)

Like any self respecting Walking Dead fan, my life right now is little more than a haze of trepidation and excitement over the appending arrival of Negan and his wee friend Lucille. 

Part of me is crazy excited for him to land; aside from the fact that JDM is an uber-dilf (seriously, murder or not, I ABSOLUTELY would), it could do with some spicing up, and we haven’t really had a proper, heavy villain since The Governor (seriously, when they decided to fast forward through the cannibals though. MADNESS).

Part of me is shitting my pants because I know his arrival pretty much certainly signals the demise of at least one of the characters, and it’s probably going to be the main ones you actually, you know, give a flying flip about.

So, in order to process my feelings, in true ‘me’ style, I have created a list of how I’d feel about each person meeting Lucille:

The ‘honestly, no no, just take them, I don’t think I’d even notice’ pile:

Rosita has been here since S4 and brings literally nothing to the table, Gabriel is - to use an expression popular with my Mother - a ‘wet lettuce’ and Aaron, Enid, Spencer and Tobin are just so completely meh. Seriously, where the fuck did Tobin come from? I have zero recollection of his arrival, then he’s suddenly snogging Carol? 

The ‘well, I mean I’d be a bit sad, but it wouldn’t ruin my day’ pile:

AKA the list of characters who have lots of potential but are being unfairly wasted due to over crowding at the minute and just sort of mingle in the background:

Abraham, Tara and everyone’s favourite mullet clad dick biter, Eugene would be no great loss. Juries still out on whether Jesus is a decent character, but if nothing else I would mourn him for his stunningly beautiful facial features. 

And it’s time to throw in the most unpopular of all unpopular opinions, but Carol doesn’t now, nor ever has, really tickled my pickle. Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry. 

y’all are all ok but I’m sorry to say I’d gleefully throw you all at Negan if it meant there was even a chance I could spare Glenn.

The ‘we’re stepping up to where I’d be a bit gutted’ territory.

Morgan, who has been completely underutilised this season. I have waited and waited and waited for his return, only for him to again be unfairly smushed into the background. I just want him and his jedi stick to get more action, and if he does perish this year then it’ll feel like M erle all over again.

Also, add Sasha to this list. I’m quite taken by her character anyway and also she is legitimately probably the prettiest person I have ever seen, and I would thoroughly miss my girl-crushing if she wasn’t around. 

The ‘well, you’ve killed them and now you’ve completely ruined my day’ list.

Rick bleeping Grimes, who has become thoroughly more interesting since he started throat biting and killing everyone. Unlike the super dull leads on shows like Lost (zzzz Jack zzz) our hero in this is much more layered abd grey and morally spicey, and it would be a real shame to see him go. However it would be one of the biggest and explosives shocks ever, which makes a teeny tiny bit of me wish they would just do it. Though I’d totally cry.

Also, add Maggie to this. She’s one of the oldies and I would weep for her, but not to the extent where I’d weep for her husband. 

And finally, the ‘if you kill them I would either cut a bitch or cry uncontrollably in the foetal position for the rest of my life’ list. 

Michonne, who is a bad mother fucker but also sweet as anything. She’s just so lovely and kind and tough and I kind of want to be her like a lot. She’s been one of my favourites since she waltzed in with her walker mutts and I can’t bare to think about her leaving.

Then, we have the big two. The two that I absolutely would not deal with being killed in such a horrid way, which sucks because in my heart of hearts I just know it’s probably going to be one of them.

Glenn, who we know from the comics is the one who gets the old smashing from Lucille. He’s been colose to death approximately 800 times already, but every time I still get a little wave of panic when he’s in peril because he’s so sweet and kind and lovely. Though that probably makes him too g ood for *this* world anyway.

And last but not least, never least, in anything is my hero/inspiration/future husband Daryl Dixon. Daryl shares the favourite character ever spot in my heart with Jesse Pinkman, and his death would be an absolutely TRAVESTY for me. Like, you know that time I mentioned where I cried in the Woolworths queue the day after book-Dumbledore died? It will be that x1000 because he’s the love of my life.

So, I’m proposing a support group forms in prep for the finale. Any takers?  

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03
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beneffleck:

Ben Affleck tries to sneak Matt Damon onto the Jimmy Kimmel show

I fucking love Ben Affleck.

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02
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image

On my umteenth re-watch in preparation for the new episodes. I tried to narrow it down to ten, but honestly it’s just too difficult.

Brace yourself for an abundance of Jess Mariano. Spoilers ahoy.  

#1. Bon Voyage.

Hated by many, wept at manically by me, I actually rather liked the Gilmore Girls finale. I like a TV finale that makes me feel sadhappy, and boy does this do that as Rory bids a fond farewell to Stars Hollow to go and conquer the world of investigative journalism.

My main quibble with the finale was that the Luke/Lorelai reunion wasn’t quite enough closure for me – I wanted to see more from the couple I’d spent seven seasons routing for. However, now we know that we’ll be seeing them both again, I can watch it with even more joy than usual.

#2. They Shoot Gilmores, Don’t They?

All of the strange festivals and traditions used to make me absolutely yearn to live in a town like Stars Hollow, and my favourite event of all was the 24 hours dance marathon. Not only did it see the Gilmore Girls looking absolutely divine in vintage clothing, but it also saw full of drama as it was finally, FINALLY out with the Dean (yawn) and in with the Jess (hurrah!)

#3. Pulp Friction.

Logan was a bit of a numpty, but overall I really enjoyed Rory’s Yale days, and one of the best times was the Tarantino themed party. There are movie references aplenty in Gilmore Girls, and this was one of the most fun. The Vega/Wallace dance, the Gogo costume…everything was just spot on for a Tarantino fan like myself.

#4. A Tisket, a Tasket.

In which Rory and Jess share one of their first proper, nice, lovely chats after he outbids Dean for a picnic basket full of disgusting food. I wasn’t at all surprised when I found out Bledel and Ventimiglia were dating in real life, because their chemistry is on point.

#5. Teach Me Tonight.

Yep, Jess again! But the car crash episode is when sparks are properly flying between the pair. I just love watching them flirt and fall in love. I never get into this shipping malarky much, but when it comes to Gilmore Girls I am Jess & Rory, Luke & Lorelia TIL I DIE. <3

#6. Lorelai’s graduation Day.

The Gilmore Girls are famous for their long winded ranting dialogues, but one of the best came when Rory grounded herself after accidentally missing her Mothers graduation by skipping to New York to meet – yep, you guessed it – Jess. It was also one of the best at showing the relationship between Lorelai and her parents.

#7. Those are strings, Pinocchio.

The Chilton graduation. The speech. The tears. THE TEARS. Absolutely bloody lovely.

#8. Girls in Bikinis, Boys Doing the Twist.

Despite that this sees the beginning of Dean’s re-emergence (ew) it’s also a pretty jam packed and fun episode. Rory flirts with a stranger! The Shins make a cameo! Paris kisses Rory! And Madeline and Louise (two of the most underrated characters) make an appearance. As I’ve stated previously – and in detail – I hope they’re back for the revival.  

#9. Raincoats and Recipes.

Yes. This is it. The one we have all waited – WAITED – for since day one. We knew it had to come, we knew our patience would be rewarded and finally – FINALLY – Luke and Lorelai kiss!!! I know I’ve been all about Jess thus far, but my fangirl heart skips just as eagerly for Luke and Lorelai and this brought joy and sunshine to even my cold, dead heart. Bonus: it also led to that brilliant fall Lorelai does when she’s feeling awkward in the diner after.

#10. The Prodigal Daughter Returns.

Boy, that half season where Lorelai and Rory weren’t speaking just wasn’t the same, was it? And because of that, their eventual – inevitable, but still emotional – reunion was lovely. Made me feel a bit watery, if I’m honest.

#11. Lorelai, Lorelai.

The classic drunk with the ex-situation, only instead of 17 barely readable text messages and a hysterical voicemail, tequila infused Lorelai accidentally winds up serenading ex (BOO!) Luke with a rendition of I Will Always Love You at a karaoke one. It was the episode, where I knew, JUST KNEW, that they were getting back together.

GUYS, someone talk to me until the revival lands. I can’t wait!

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02
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All about these two.

(via bartonfinks)

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02
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Str8 Jersey Shore lifeguard Ronnie in a gay Situation
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Nasty blonde chick works a black boner during a wild massage

This episode is great.

(via swampslutbitch)

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So, I spent Sunday at Walker Stalker in London and whilst I had a lovely time, it wouldn’t be right to not go into the negatives of the event. However, I’m still on something of a buzz right now (despite consuming what I think must’ve been a dodgy burrito and vomiting on my bedroom floor this morning) so I’m going to start by posting all the fantastic things that happened, and go neg a different day in the near future. 

Every wondered what it would be like to soberly get on a crowded tube at 9am on a Sunday dressed like this? One word: challenging. The ironic wolf whistles were flying. But it was worth it because the con - and wine - were waiting.

The first person I met was Greg Nicotero, who basically created EVERY gross bit in all of my favourite gross films and TV shows. Essentially, he is living my dream. He is also a very nice and chatty man. We gave him a Kinder Egg (contraband, cause th ey’re illegal in the US) and he said it was the best gift he’d received all week. A blatant lie, because, well, 80p, but still kind of him. 

Next up, we got a Breaking Bad combo, and guess what, they were also bloody lovely. They dressed very smart (which is nice, because - beautiful as they are - Lincoln and Reedus looked moderately homeless through out) and were very chatty.

Also, in other fashion news, I’m like 90% sure I saw David M orissey in a powder blue cardigan. Menacing..

I can’t fully remember what I said to Gus (cause wine) but he laughed at a few things I said and said he was pleased when I told him I was scared of him. He also said ‘please don’t get green on my suit.’ and kept firmly away from my face when I hugged him goodbye.

And RJ Mitte is honestly one of the nicest, most polite people I’ve ever met. He says hello with a handshake and asks how you’re enjoying the event and compliments you. EXCLUSIVE INFORMATION I also have the same colour hair as his sister. Or assistant. I can’t remember properly (again, cause wine). 

I also got to spend the day (not to mention a drunken Saturd ay evening with this lovely creature). We started talking like three years ago now via Twitter over our mutual love of Norman Reedus, and yesterday we met up for our third con together.

We sat upstairs for a while and it was the best seat because Melissa Mcbride and Andrew Lincoln both walked past us.

So did the real Abraham, who is blonde. And then a fake Abraham (’fabraham’), who was ginger but still somehow managed to saunter into the VIP bit, which was impressive. 

It’s so lovely that the first stranger I met online wasn’t a murderer, I love you Ky!

Next up was Sonequa Martin Green AKA Sasha, who is straight up probably the prettiest person I have EVER seen in real life, she is flawless. She also didn’t stop smiling for the entire day I don’t think. She was very warm and fun. 

The  pièce de résistance though, if you will, was meeting this fine and majestic specimen for the second time because HOT DAMN I love him. Here is an EXACT run down of the approximate 13 seconds I got to spend in his presence:

Get to front of queue. Very angry man at front of queue is ushering us through like terrifying enemy soldier in war film. ‘GO GO GO!’ he bellows, so we step forward and start to inhale the warm, heavenly musk of the Reedster (side note: I will never, type that again, I promise). 

Him (cheeky smile): ‘uh oh, what happened to you two?

Us: *A giggle, a squeak, no words, as far as I can remember. His arm goes around us and I die a thousand deaths.*

Me: (brain suddenly functioning) WAIT! PLEASE HOLD OUR HANDS. (panic in my voice was due to incurring the fury of angry hurry up man, but this probably came off as desperate and terrifying). 

Him: Oh, wait, what do you want me to do? (he probably feared the wrath of angry hurry up man as well to be fair).

Me: Hold our hands please!

Him: Ok! *He holds our hands and I cling like a psychopath because my brain is now mush because I’m touching my future husband and he’s touching his future wife even though he doesn’t know is yet and is probably repulsed by the sight of me because I am green and hyperventilating* 

Photo is done. I must leave my beloved.

Us: Thank you!

Him: You two are adorable.

Me: *beaming*

Rachy: Did he just say we’re horrible.

Me: No, he said we were adorable.

Rachy: Oh. Good. 

Then we exit on a cloud made of sunshine and joy because everything is wonderful we have just squeezed the fingers of a sexual hero. 

The end. 

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02
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Pitched as Romero meets Mad Max, the collision of those two heavy weights would set many zombie fan heart a fluttering, however, due to my deathly allergy to car chases only half of that statement tickled my fancy, but thankfully I sort of loved this.

Wyrmrood: Road of the Dead definitely loses some momentum by its conclusion, however it’s still a thoroughly ruddy fun ride throughout.

It follows many of the familiar tropes of the genre, however it also has lots of fun and fresh ideas (I won’t spoil, but there’s some fantastic sort of super powers that emerge in this) and lots of different little stories and flashbacks that hold your interest throughout.

Its modest budget only helps provide charm, and the zombies are scary when they need to be. Wyrmwood is wild and fun and weird and if you like a zombie film you should definitely seek it out.

Once again, Australia you haven’t disappointed.

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Despite it being in production hell for ages, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies has been on my radar for ages because honestly I’m always game for shit like this.

I love anything kitch and weird with zombies in it, so they idea of spicing up a decidedly dull and prim classic story (give me a necro-loving Bronte novel over twee Austin any day) was right up my street. Sadly, little worked in the final effort.

Initially, all kinds of names were being touted for the very starrey cast, including Natalie Portman as Elizabeth which I think could’ve been excellent. Instead, we ended up with a group of mildly famous ensemble, the majority of whom were massively miscast, pariculalry in the case of the two leads.

For one of the most well know couples in literary history, it seems like a massive oversight that they’ve chosen to cast a Darcy and Miss Bennet with absolutely zero chemistry. Their romance left me completely and utterly cold.

Also, they cast the excellent Lena Heady in a role that promised much zombie slicing and murdering, then they did fuck all with her. Like, literally, I don’t think you even see her fight one zombie when she eventually rocks up. Baffling. Thank god Matt Smith decided to show up, as he just about saves the whole thing by providing moments of actual entertainment in all the flat nothingness.

Then of course there’s the issue of the zombies. There just aren’t enough of them. And when they do show up they aren’t even remotely scary.

I’d have preferred if they just went wild and crazy and bonkers with the premise, instead of creating this safe and stranglely bland effort, that limps towards a weak cliffhanger that, if a sequel does my some miracle appear, wild zombies couldn’t drag me to see.

☆☆

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02
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(Because I’m so demanding like that) is a return for Madeline and Louise.

I know they weren’t even in the last few seasons, but I’d love them to turn up with either their really old, rich husbands or their really young, broke toy boys and they’re just still partying all the time and living life to the full and they always have a martini in their hands and they just haven’t changed at all. Basically, they’re Patsy and Edina from Ab Fab and it’s wonderful.

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02
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Say what you will about the Revenant, but we all know Leo will never better this.

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02
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meredithgery:

Happy Valentine’s Day, from Chris Traeger ♥

(via sophie-xcx)

     
02
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This is DEFINITELY going to be the time he falls madly in love with me. (Note to self - make a better fucking face in the photo this time).

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01
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So the SAG awards definitely gave me my fix of award season pretty ladies in pretty dresses. Not sure about the style of Brie’s but I love the colour. Rooney’s dress is my favourite and Amy Poehler looks spectacular as a red head.

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